DATE
COOPER.
One man. One domain name. Several surprisingly strong references.
This website is, regrettably, real.
Why date Cooper?
Raised with suspiciously specific door etiquette.
Will hold doors, carry luggage, stand when appropriate, and generally behave like someone transported here from a better hotel lobby.
Can talk about almost anything.
Semiconductors, airplanes, sailing, cities, obscure history, robotics, restaurants. Silence is unlikely to be the problem.
Has several plans at all times.
Some are sensible. Some involve founding companies. Some involve buying old Land Rovers. You will be briefed.
Please read before investing.
May overthink a text message.
A period instead of an exclamation point can trigger a small internal review committee.
Will notice weird infrastructure.
You may be trying to enjoy a building. Cooper may be trying to figure out its HVAC, zoning, electrical service, or construction history.
Occasionally turns dates into field trips.
Possible destinations include airports, marinas, factories visible from public roads, and restaurants chosen with excessive conviction.
Likely good fit if…
Green flags
- You are warm, funny, curious, and can communicate directly.
- You enjoy nice dinners but can also find a stupid adventure funny.
- You have your own life and like someone who has his own too.
- You can tolerate a man becoming visibly excited by industrial equipment.
Potential incompatibilities
- You believe “k” is a complete emotional communication system.
- You want to live in an HOA and speak positively about it.
- You hate boats, planes, cities, cats, or hearing “wait, this is actually interesting.”
- You require a boyfriend who has never purchased a joke domain.
FAQ
Is this a bit?
Legally, yes. Operationally, we will see.
Is Cooper normal?
Within tolerances.
What is he looking for?
A relationship with someone kind, attractive, interesting, independent, and capable of telling him when he is being ridiculous.
What happens if I click the button?
Your email app opens. No personality test, no recruiter, no seven-stage interview loop.
Worst case, you get a funny story.
Send a note. Suggested contents: who you are, why this absurd website worked on you, and one thing you think Cooper should know before meeting you.